This a simple, yet effective, model of communication that can be applied in sales situation (convincing a client to buy your product / service) or/and in interpersonal relationships (for instance, when having an argument with your spouse…).
The first stage is called “diagnosis” and refers to our ability to comprehend the situation. You see, most people are so overwhelmed by their own problems, lost in their thoughts and concerns, that spend little or no time at all, to actually understand other peoples’ needs. This sort of “selective blindness” (or deafness if you prefer) to external stimuli, may be considered a defense mechanism, aimed at protecting us from absorbing stress coming from our environment (to put it simply, we have so much worries to deal with, that we don’t want to bother ourselves with other peoples’ problems…).
The reason why we don't attract the people we desire (eg. romantic partners) is because we are not "in tune" with them. What does this mean? It means that when we are angry, disagreeable, critical, and competitive we tend to attract partners with the same characteristics. You see, "birds of a feather flock together", meaning that similar people tend to associate with each other. Thus, what you attract in your life reflects something in yourself. You may like this "part" of yours or not; furthermore, you may even be unaware of its existence, as you probably have been hiding it for a long time. Yet, it manifests in the people you come across (the reason being to help you gain greater awareness, so that you can learn how to deal with it, grow as a person, and move forward).
In our modern life, there are a lot of things that might cause anger to us! Various incidents, people who disappoint us, the fact that we don’t like ourselves sometimes, are some of the sources leading to anger and frustration. Anger is a healthy emotion provided that it is kept within healthy boundaries… The scope of anger is to focus our attention on something important that is happening, which might be a potential threat. Thus, anger is a “red light” turned on to signal that we should protect ourselves from a dangerous situation (e.g. in case we are unfairly treated, thus it is likely we will be taken advantage of, and so on).
Yet, excessive and prolonged anger can literally destroy our life! It leads us to fight with almost everyone in the world: our friends, relatives, parents, colleagues, clients. We lose people who are valuable to us. And the most important thing is that we lose our own peace and balance, the prerequisites of our well-being.
But how can we, practically, cope with anger?
According to Charles Darwin’s theory of evolution, there is a mechanism called “natural selection” through which, the most advantageous members of species -featuring a unique variation of a trait (e.g. a special kind of wings) - can survive and grow, while the less advantageous ones tend to vanish.
Although Darwin’s theory has been disputed, the concept of evolution is widely accepted in biology as well as other scientific disciplines, as it can explain a whole lot of naturally happening phenomena. Now, take this principle (of natural selection) and transfer it to the entrepreneurial arena. Businesses which are capable of changing and adapting to competitive environments are the ones that survive and flourish.
The difference is that-in contrast to the animal world-a business, headed by humans, can change and grow on purpose; and this is accomplished by creating and implementing a successful strategy. Thus, a business strategy is nothing but a roadmap leading to desired outcomes (sales, profits, growth); in addition, to be robust from an evolutionary point-of-view, a good strategy should be based on the unique competitive advantages of the enterprise.
Dear readers, quite often the various obstacles we come across in our efforts to succeed, are the result of other peoples’ influences. People in our environment, relatives, friends, schoolmates, colleagues may exert some sort of, subtle, influence on us. The eminent personal development guru, Jim Rohn said “your income is the average of the income of the 5 people you meet most frequently in your everyday life”. In a similar vein, Deepak Chopra (the well-known physician and author) said “your degree of happiness is the average of the happiness levels of the 5 most important people in your life”.
But, how does this happen?
Success does not necessarily have to be difficult! You see, most people believe that achieving their goals is something hard, a tedious task they have to put all their efforts into, and then wait for the right circumstances or lady luck to favor them. In fact, getting what you want out of life, be it a professional or a personal goal is neither easy nor difficult... There are specific rules or principles if you like, which if followed can lead to success in a natural way. Moreover, the question of difficulty or easiness is a rather misleading one; it provides an easy excuse for non-effort and withdrawal: "-if success is easy, why should I try hard?"; similarly, "-if it is difficult, what's the point of trying?" (!) The right question we should ask is "-what are the principles and mechanisms one should follow, to make his/her goals a reality?"
What I believe is that this world operates in accordance with specific laws: